Post by DEERTRACKS on Dec 21, 2006 6:45:20 GMT -5
Rules to Enter Indiana :
Applies to each person as they enter Indiana. Learn & remember:
East Coast and California-types pay particular attention!
1.) Pull up your droopy pants. You look like an idiot.
2.) Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road." I drive a
pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're
going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3.) There are cattle, hog, chicken and turkey farms. That's what they
smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like
it? I-69 and I-65 runs North and South, Hwy-40 and I-70 run East and
West. Pick one.
4.) So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000
combines that are driven only 6 weeks a year.
5.) So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being
friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6.) If that cell phone rings while a herd of deer is coming in, we
WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have
it up to your ear at the time.
7.) Yeah, we eat catfish & bluegill. You really want sushi & caviar?
It's available at the corner bait shop.
8.) The "Opener" refers to the first day of Deer Season. It's a
religious holiday and a good excuse to take off of work.
9.) We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10.) No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak.
Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
11.) When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
12.) You bring "coke" into our houses, it better be brown, wet, and
served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane"into the house, she better be
cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13) College and High School Football is as important here as the
Lakers and the Knicks, and a site more fun to watch.
14.) Yeah, we have golf courses. But we don't hit the water hazards -
it spooks the fish.
15.) Colleges? Indiana University, Purdue and Notre Dame. They come
outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and
they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
16.) Indiana is the crossroad of America. If you're from the East or
West coast, you're more than welcome to stop and visit a while, but
leave your liberal ideas at the state line. You will soon find out
that Hoosiers are a hard working, God fearing people and we sure don't
need advice on how to live our lives.
of course this works for IOWA too.........
Applies to each person as they enter Indiana. Learn & remember:
East Coast and California-types pay particular attention!
1.) Pull up your droopy pants. You look like an idiot.
2.) Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road." I drive a
pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're
going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3.) There are cattle, hog, chicken and turkey farms. That's what they
smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like
it? I-69 and I-65 runs North and South, Hwy-40 and I-70 run East and
West. Pick one.
4.) So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000
combines that are driven only 6 weeks a year.
5.) So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being
friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6.) If that cell phone rings while a herd of deer is coming in, we
WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have
it up to your ear at the time.
7.) Yeah, we eat catfish & bluegill. You really want sushi & caviar?
It's available at the corner bait shop.
8.) The "Opener" refers to the first day of Deer Season. It's a
religious holiday and a good excuse to take off of work.
9.) We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10.) No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak.
Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
11.) When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
12.) You bring "coke" into our houses, it better be brown, wet, and
served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane"into the house, she better be
cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13) College and High School Football is as important here as the
Lakers and the Knicks, and a site more fun to watch.
14.) Yeah, we have golf courses. But we don't hit the water hazards -
it spooks the fish.
15.) Colleges? Indiana University, Purdue and Notre Dame. They come
outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and
they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
16.) Indiana is the crossroad of America. If you're from the East or
West coast, you're more than welcome to stop and visit a while, but
leave your liberal ideas at the state line. You will soon find out
that Hoosiers are a hard working, God fearing people and we sure don't
need advice on how to live our lives.
of course this works for IOWA too.........
