Post by tusti on Aug 30, 2008 18:42:57 GMT -5
Little known facts about Sarah Palin
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1.) Sarah Palin isn’t allowed to wield the gavel at the convention because they’re afraid she’ll use it to kill liberals.
2.) Sarah Palin once one a competitive eating contest by devouring three live caribou.
3.) Sarah Palin once carved a perfect likeness of the Mona Lisa in a block of ice using only her teeth.
4.) Sarah Palin will pry your Klondike bar from your cold dead fingers.
5.) Sarah Palin pick retroactively makes the theme of #DNC08 “Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead”
6.) Sarah Palin doesn’t need a gun to hunt. She has been known to throw a bullet through an adult bull elk.
7.) Sarah Palin drives a Zamboni to work ( Actually, she walks )
8.) Sarah Palin was kicked off Survivor for killing a man and eating his entrails.
9.) Sarah Palin is actually Kaiser Sose
10.) Sarah Palin can divide by zero
11.) Sarah Palin can read EBCDIC
12.) Sarah Palin is the only woman who can make Tony Romo WIN a playoff.
13.) Sarah Palin would have just had an Eagle drop the Ring into Mount Doom.
14.) The Arctic Circle runs through Alaska so the Sun can have some relief from Sarah Palin’s bright glare
15.) Sarah Palin will send Biden a pre-debate cheat sheet. The sheet will have tips on defending against Kung Fu Death Grip.
16.) If placed into Schroedinger’s experiment, both Sarah Palins remain alive.
17.) Sarah Palin scares Chuck Norris.
18.) Sarah Palin poses more danger of creating world-destroying black holes than the Large Hadron Collidor
19.) Sarah Palin got Tom Brady pregnant, and then left him
20.) Sarah Palin will give birth to the man who will lead humanity’s war against the machines.
21.) Sarah Palin knows how old the Chinese gymnasts are.
22.) Sarah Palin wears glasses lest her uncontrollable optic blasts slaughter everyone.
23.) Sarah Palin’s son is going to Iraq after the Surge, because a Palin during the Surge would have been unfair.
24.) Sarah Palin is the “other” whom Yoda spoke about.
25.) Sarah Palin holds the world record for swimming the Bering Strait. Covered in OIL
26.) When Sarah Palin says "jump", Jack Bauer asks "How high and when can I come down, Ma'am"
27.) Sarah Palin was not flown to Ohio in charter jet- she ran as part of morning workout
28.) Sarah Palin's husband finished 4th last year in a 2,000 mile snowmobile race...w/ a broken arm
29.) Sarah Palin does not believe in using a hyphen.
30.) Sarah Palin introduced the foxtrot to Papua New Guinea
31.) Sarah Palin accomplished in two years as Governor the kind of change that Obama talks about...but has never actually done
32.) Sarah Palin once bit the head off a live Osprey snatched from the air as it tried to fly off with a fish she caught
33.) We can rebuild Sarah Palin. We have the technology.
34.) Sarah Palin uses seal fat makeup
35.) Sarah Palin made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs.
36.) Sarah Palin made Pi = 3
37.) Sarah Palin hunts, ice fishes, eats mooseburger, rides snowmobiles, has run a marathon, and owns a float plane.
38.) Sarah Palin has often played Tina Fey's body double.
39.) Bill Belichick has been taping Sarah Palin for years.
40.) Sarah Palin can catch salmon swimming upstream with her teeth.
41.) Corrupt Republicans and Democrats?: The Sarah Palin Hawk eats them from Alaska's soil, and regurgitates them in the mouths of hungry children
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1.) Sarah Palin isn’t allowed to wield the gavel at the convention because they’re afraid she’ll use it to kill liberals.
2.) Sarah Palin once one a competitive eating contest by devouring three live caribou.
3.) Sarah Palin once carved a perfect likeness of the Mona Lisa in a block of ice using only her teeth.
4.) Sarah Palin will pry your Klondike bar from your cold dead fingers.
5.) Sarah Palin pick retroactively makes the theme of #DNC08 “Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead”
6.) Sarah Palin doesn’t need a gun to hunt. She has been known to throw a bullet through an adult bull elk.
7.) Sarah Palin drives a Zamboni to work ( Actually, she walks )
8.) Sarah Palin was kicked off Survivor for killing a man and eating his entrails.
9.) Sarah Palin is actually Kaiser Sose
10.) Sarah Palin can divide by zero
11.) Sarah Palin can read EBCDIC
12.) Sarah Palin is the only woman who can make Tony Romo WIN a playoff.
13.) Sarah Palin would have just had an Eagle drop the Ring into Mount Doom.
14.) The Arctic Circle runs through Alaska so the Sun can have some relief from Sarah Palin’s bright glare
15.) Sarah Palin will send Biden a pre-debate cheat sheet. The sheet will have tips on defending against Kung Fu Death Grip.
16.) If placed into Schroedinger’s experiment, both Sarah Palins remain alive.
17.) Sarah Palin scares Chuck Norris.
18.) Sarah Palin poses more danger of creating world-destroying black holes than the Large Hadron Collidor
19.) Sarah Palin got Tom Brady pregnant, and then left him
20.) Sarah Palin will give birth to the man who will lead humanity’s war against the machines.
21.) Sarah Palin knows how old the Chinese gymnasts are.
22.) Sarah Palin wears glasses lest her uncontrollable optic blasts slaughter everyone.
23.) Sarah Palin’s son is going to Iraq after the Surge, because a Palin during the Surge would have been unfair.
24.) Sarah Palin is the “other” whom Yoda spoke about.
25.) Sarah Palin holds the world record for swimming the Bering Strait. Covered in OIL
26.) When Sarah Palin says "jump", Jack Bauer asks "How high and when can I come down, Ma'am"
27.) Sarah Palin was not flown to Ohio in charter jet- she ran as part of morning workout
28.) Sarah Palin's husband finished 4th last year in a 2,000 mile snowmobile race...w/ a broken arm
29.) Sarah Palin does not believe in using a hyphen.
30.) Sarah Palin introduced the foxtrot to Papua New Guinea
31.) Sarah Palin accomplished in two years as Governor the kind of change that Obama talks about...but has never actually done
32.) Sarah Palin once bit the head off a live Osprey snatched from the air as it tried to fly off with a fish she caught
33.) We can rebuild Sarah Palin. We have the technology.
34.) Sarah Palin uses seal fat makeup
35.) Sarah Palin made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs.
36.) Sarah Palin made Pi = 3
37.) Sarah Palin hunts, ice fishes, eats mooseburger, rides snowmobiles, has run a marathon, and owns a float plane.
38.) Sarah Palin has often played Tina Fey's body double.
39.) Bill Belichick has been taping Sarah Palin for years.
40.) Sarah Palin can catch salmon swimming upstream with her teeth.
41.) Corrupt Republicans and Democrats?: The Sarah Palin Hawk eats them from Alaska's soil, and regurgitates them in the mouths of hungry children
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