Post by archer461582 on Jun 10, 2008 10:23:15 GMT -5
GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER
1. Sag, you're It.
2. Hide and go pee.
3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the bucket
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over.
6. Musical recliners.
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy
9. Spin the bottle of Mylanta.
SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE:
1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale.
2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them.
3. You change your underwear after a sneeze.
4. Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him.
5. The Phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest.
6. You're on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendale's.
OLD IS WHEN:
1. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
2. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
3. Getting a little action means I don't need fiber today.
4. Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
5. An all-nighter means not getting up to pee!
6. Your sweetie says, "Lets go upstairs and make love," and you answer, Honey, I can't do both!"
7. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
8.The porn you bring home is "Debby Does Dialysis."
9. A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door nearest your car.
10.You remember when the Dead Sea was only sick.
11.When it takes longer to rest than to get tired.
12.When you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
13."Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
But Most Of All, Remember!
A Good Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!
1. Sag, you're It.
2. Hide and go pee.
3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the bucket
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over.
6. Musical recliners.
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy
9. Spin the bottle of Mylanta.
SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE:
1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale.
2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them.
3. You change your underwear after a sneeze.
4. Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him.
5. The Phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest.
6. You're on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendale's.
OLD IS WHEN:
1. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
2. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
3. Getting a little action means I don't need fiber today.
4. Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
5. An all-nighter means not getting up to pee!
6. Your sweetie says, "Lets go upstairs and make love," and you answer, Honey, I can't do both!"
7. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
8.The porn you bring home is "Debby Does Dialysis."
9. A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door nearest your car.
10.You remember when the Dead Sea was only sick.
11.When it takes longer to rest than to get tired.
12.When you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
13."Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
But Most Of All, Remember!
A Good Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!
