The Italian Bride

Maria had justa gotten married, and being a traditional Italian she
was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her mother's
house, she wazza very nervous. Her mother reassured her;

"Don'a worry, Maria, Tony's a good man.. Go upstairs and he'll taka
care of you. Meanwhile, I'll be making pasta."

So, upa she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took offa his shirt and
exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says,
"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a biga hairy chest."

"Don't worry, Maria," says the mother, "all good men have hairy
chests. Go upstairs. He'll taka good cara you.".........

So, uppa she went again. When she got up in the bedroom, Tony took off
his pants exposing his hairy legs. Again, Maria ran downstairs to her
mother.

"Mama, Mama, Tony tooka off his pants and he's gota hairy
legs!".........

"Don't worry! All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man. Go
upstairs and he'll taka good care of you."

So, upa she went again. When she got there, Tony took off his socks
and on his left foot he was missing three toes. When Maria saw this, she ran
downstairs.......

"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half !"
Her mama said...............

"Stay here and stir the pasta!"